I am a feminist.

'I read with interest the article about the decline in the number of women calling themselves feminists (Metro, Fri). There have been, and probably always will be, arguments and disagreements when dealing with the word 'feminism'. One thing is certain (yet most people seem to have forgotten): to say you are not a feminist is to say you are actually in favour of female oppression.

Feminism is not about burning your bra in the street. It is about women getting up in the morning and leaving the house to go to a job that pays them an actual wage. It is about women going to the polling station on the eve of an election and putting a mark next to their chosen political party. It is about women owning their own homes, being able to inherit, having access to contraception, going to school...

So when Netmums state that only one in seven women calls herself a feminist, I find myself thinking it is a sorry state of affairs that women have become to complacent.

Feminism is not a radical ideology. It is a word that means 'equality' and it has validated our lives. And it should never be forgotten. It should never be ignored. It should never be denied'

Laura Smith 


Thank you Laura for making my Tuesday morning. This is spot on.

Snow White had lost her infatuation with the prince. they only had sex maybe once a week now, and even when they did it was eh. she found herself looking at photos of Ryan Gosling online, remembering when she felt about the prince how she felt looking at him.

'But the prince loves me' she thought, 'and if i were with ryan gosling he’d be prettier than me and that wouldn’t be cool at all'. 

Source: http://fairytalesfor20somethings.tumblr.com/

Beauty and the Beast

Giovana Medeiros

Beauty wanted to bring the Beast to meet her friends but she was nervous because they all had these super-hot boyfriends who worked in finance. She loved the Beast for who he was, she really did, but her friends were shallow and judgmental.

“Maybe you should get some new friends,” Siri advised.

Source: http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/fairy-tales-for-20-somethings-beautys-anxiety-about-introducing-beast-to-friends/

Grow Old...

"Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be"
-Robert Browning 

Etiquette part 2

Etiquette

I took the Polaroid down in my room
I'm pretty sure you have a new girlfriend
It's not as if I don't like you
It just makes me sad whenever I see it
'cause I like to be gone most of the time
And you like to be home most of the time
If I stay in one place I lose my mind
I'm a pretty impossible lady to be with

Things I saw at uni...

Hard Sun

Food Theories and facts

1) Mayo is the condiment of God's.

2)Food ALWAYS tastes better in a bowl. It just does.

3)Light Babel Bells are a weight watchers friend (1 point!)

4)Lea and Perrins makes any tomato based food better.

5)Butter in a sarnie is wrong... except if it's a bacon sarnie.

Get your priorities straight

I copied this off a friend's facebook:

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full.. The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand.The students laughed..

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.. The sand is everything else---the small stuff.

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and mow the lawn.

Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented. The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.' The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.

Babel

Press my nose up to the glass around your heart.
I should have known I was weaker from the start.
You'll build your walls and I'll play my bloody part.
To tear, tear them down.

Two of my favourite things

Bitch
Carolyn Kizer

Now, when he and I meet, after all these years,

I say to the bitch inside me, don’t start growling.   

He isn’t a trespasser anymore,

Just an old acquaintance tipping his hat.

My voice says, “Nice to see you,”

As the bitch starts to bark hysterically.

He isn’t an enemy now,

Where are your manners, I say, as I say,

“How are the children? They must be growing up.”   

At a kind word from him, a look like the old days,   

The bitch changes her tone; she begins to whimper.   

She wants to snuggle up to him, to cringe.

Down, girl! Keep your distance

Or I’ll give you a taste of the choke-chain.

“Fine, I’m just fine,” I tell him.

She slobbers and grovels.

After all, I am her mistress. She is basically loyal.   

It’s just that she remembers how she came running   

Each evening, when she heard his step;

How she lay at his feet and looked up adoringly   

Though he was absorbed in his paper;

Or, bored with her devotion, ordered her to the kitchen   

Until he was ready to play.

But the small careless kindnesses

When he’d had a good day, or a couple of drinks,

Come back to her now, seem more important

Than the casual cruelties, the ultimate dismissal.

“It’s nice to know you are doing so well,” I say.

He couldn’t have taken you with him;

You were too demonstrative, too clumsy,

Not like the well-groomed pets of his new friends.   

“Give my regards to your wife,” I say. You gag

As I drag you off by the scruff,

Saying, “Goodbye! Goodbye! Nice to have seen you again.”

Lesson 1

Lesson 1

At least I've learned this much:
Life doesn't have to be
all poetry and roses. Life
can be bus rides, gritty sidewalks,
electric bills, dishwashing,
chapped lips, dull stubby pencils
with the erasers chewed off,
cheap radios played too loud,
the rank smell of stale coffee 
yet still glow
with the inner fire of an opal,
still taste like honey.


by Julie Hill Alger

Broken Crown

So crawl on my belly 'til the sun goes down
I'll never wear your broken crown
I can take the road and I can fuck it all away
But in this twilight our choices seal our fate

This album is amaze-balls #Justsaying. 

As this mental week draws to a close and my twenty-second birthday beckons I find myself reflecting on things.

Relationships

We have all had that new, fresh stage of a relationship- I'm not just limiting 'relationship' to a purely sexual term here. The nerves, and the silly worries. I have a friend who is constantly worried that she is being too clingy. Having had bad relationships with her flatmates before moving to Cardiff she restricted herself to a small group of people who she only saw at uni after the move. Until she finally shook herself, and took a chance and asked the right questions, namely will you be my friend?

I recently started a new job. I met a few people who I instantly desired to be my friends. Cool, funny, inclusive lads and lasses. So I outright asked one of the girls to be my chum- and now we have girly chats every morning about the 'husband hunting diet', ex's, fishing and whatever else crosses our mind in that instant. Today we decided to persuade Dave to put pen to paper and create a novel, 'Things that are frowned upon which shouldn't be'- like Bigamy...

My favourite bit of this honeymoon stage is finding out that new tid-bit of information that shatters an assumed idea. We all do it: we meet someone and instantly cast our eyes over their clothes, their shoes, their hair, the trustworthiness of their face, the scar on their hand. We create a sterotype for them to fall into from pictures in our minds that we have seen before. The second someone doesn't conform, we scald ourselves with the growing realisation that we judged them. We'll laugh, and learn and be surprised.

Yes, sometimes relationships don't work out how we wanted to, or thought they would. Friends grow apart or fall out, couples split up, and then occasionally something that you assumed would begin doesn't. I choose to see the silver lining in all of these situations. The bad bits will always be there, but I always remember the moments that made me happy and cherish them.     

Violence

I read the Metro on the way to work. Each day I read about the terrible shit that is happening throughout the world. Little April Jones going missing, the Manchester Police Officers' deaths, pictures of injured women, men and children from wars. It is heartbreaking.

Stories of sexual assault  murder, fighting.

It all gets a little bit too much sometimes. I know that some people might dislike me for it, but I am glad that I can close the paper and concentrate on my day and leave those horrific stories in the pages. I am not naive. I know I am not immune to it, and some may view this as a selfish act. But where would we be if the world mourned every day because of what was in the news.

A depressing, dark place.

Birthdays

So I have been on this planet for 22 years. Sometimes I wish I could rewind, and watch parts again. The good and the bad. All that I have seen in this short time- faces, places, countries- all the illnesses I've suffered- all the boys I have kissed, all the stupid mistakes I have made, all the right decisions I took. It would be interesting. This may seem like a lot of pretentious shit, but what got me thinking was a friend who asked me once, 'How many dogs do you think you have seen in your life-time?'

Anyway. For some reason I don't feel like celebrating much this year. I'm here. I feel like I should be somewhere else sometimes. Other times I feel unsure and distressed about the job situation/living at home. I am lucky in that I have a crack group of friends at home as well as in Cardiff and I know we will have a lovely time whatever we do. But for me, I don't want to celebrate another step closer to my death this year and panic about what I haven't done, but rather just enjoy the company of my friends.

Friends

Oh dear chums.

Lizzy: Pine. Kate: Meow. Joss: I wuv woo. Steff: Stop playing your drums I'm trying to read. Shem: Here a degu, there a degu.

I miss living in the chaotic den that was my house. But I love visiting.

Distance

I am always where I need to be. Where I want to be, is often another matter! Everytime I get my holiday Groupon email I am so tempted to book a week away somewhere! But now I am determined to get out of this overdraft and save. Saving for what, who knows at this point. Perhaps a flat? (If this is the case, it definitely won't be anytime soon!).

Oh you guys

The day my cat sat like a human